Have a Good Laugh
Posted On Tuesday, July 22, 2008 at by Glenn LegaspiMrs. Tanoy is very frugal. When her husband died, she inquired with the newspaper, asking the price for the obituary. The ad taker said: "300 pesos for 5 words."
She said: "Can it be 2 words only? "Tanoy dead""
Ad taker: "No ma'am. 5 words is the minimum."
After thinking for a while, Mrs. Tanoy said: "Ok, to make it worth, write this:
"TANOY DEAD, TOYOTA FOR SALE"
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Man at 33 quits smoking. Will Power;
At 43, quits drinking. Will Power;
At 53, quits gambling. Will Power;
At 63, quits having sex. Power Failure.
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Man: This is insane! Who will believe such news!?! There is no such person who has that weight!
Woman: Where and what is that news about?
Man: Here in the newspaper and it says "British tourist lost 2000 pounds."
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Thomas applying as a security guard...
Interviewer: We need someone who has suspicious mind, highly alert, insistent personality, strong sense of hearing with a killer instinct. Do you think you are qualified?
Thomas: I think I am not. but, can my wife apply for the job?
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CUSTOMER
A man was carrying 3 babies in a train. Lady sitting next asked, "Are they your babies?"
Man: "No, I work in a condom factory and these are customer complaints!"
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ACCIDENT
A lawyer driving on a highway notices a crowd in an intersection. With his urge to get into the thick crowd and see the action, he shouted, "I'M THE SON OF THE VICTIM."
Upon hearing, the people made way for him to get through. There he saw, bloody and helpless lying in front of the people...
a pig bumped by a trailer truck!
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PAINT
Husband: Honey, I am going to paint the walls of the bathroom.
Wife: Why are you wearing 2 jackets? It's very hot!!!
Husband: It says in the label, "for best results put on 2 coats."